It Don't Mean a Thing |
Cast Captain Robert Smith -- Bruce Campbell Guest Stars Jeff the Ninja - Production Writer: D. M. Jeftinija Chronology |
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It Don't Mean a Thing
Plot Synopsis
The crew learns to dance because of Alice's crush on Jeff.
Plot Summary
Alice has an interest in Jeff that he does not share, and while she spends her time looking for him, he spends his time evading her. Alice tries to confide in Belinda but Belinda is not remarkably interested in the situation, especially since Alice is making it into more than it needs to be. Furstrated by her earlier attempts Alice convinces Marty to announce a mandatory ballroom dance lesson for the crew.
As the crew gathers for the lesson they find that it is Skip who is an accomplished dancer and will be teaching them. Skip instructs them to partner up, with an uneven number of men and women TAG and Robin are forced to dance together. Skip suggests that it is not a problem and they will be changing partners, to which Alice tells him that they will not and he is forced to agree. At this point Skip introduces his partner Ensign Amanda Beckman who has nothing but snide remarks for Skip.
The first lesson is the waltz wherein Alice attempts to have Jeff grab her ass. This is followed by the Tango where even Johnny's wife doesn't appreciate his advances. The foxtrot is then taught and Alice mistakes it for an opportunity to be thrown through the air, colliding with Marty and Belinda.
After the lesson they are given some time to dance on their own and the ship's dj, Ensign Mell comes out to play for them, which Skip warns them about. Soon they are left listening to terrible music and we learn that Ensign Mell has been around a long time and not really advanced beyond his current position.
The crew socialize and dance and Red is seen with a mysterious girl.
Jeff discovers the whole thing was a plot by Alice and decides to take his revenge.
Critical Reception
References and Allusions
- The title of this episode refers to the song It don't mean a thing, if it ain't got that swing which there is no swing lesson in the comic, thus it "don't mean a thing."
- Most of the events and comments here have occurred to the Author at some point or another during dances.
- Ensign Beckman is based on a very real person with an only slightly less exaggerated personality than this.